It kind of feels like we have broken up; Reading things I wrote about you before and a bunch of other things, I might know why. This is my theory. We eased into it; our beginning, felt more like a continuation, and then we had a steady flow of interaction. Isn’t this what happens to any relationship? We are having our down time. It is not entirely a bad thing. I kind of needed it because you sort of had me awed. I needed to step back; we needed to start afresh, as friends; not as that cool guy I had been dying to meet. Not that guy that at some point I thought I was trying to impress; it did become a tad bit confusing. I knew it was time to step back when I got jealous, I felt it running deep in my veins at a time when I was kind of sensitive, more inclined towards negative energy than anything else. I wanted so much from people and unfortunately, no one gave me what I wanted. That is because I have to ask for it. I caught a glimpse of the old me, dropping hints, testing waters, to see who would be interested, then I stopped. People have problems, let me just listen to theirs and let God sort me out.
Dear God, I think you and I have a lot of un resolved issues; which I believe I am trying to cover over with scripture promises and music. The hugs are awkward now. They feel really awkward, but it could just be me. I miss my friend.