Friday, August 3, 2012


Considering the world we live in, we all need therapy. I am seeing someone about my current state of being. I know so many people who would be tres excited if the statement had ended at "I'm seeing someone" :). But anyway, I have had myself admitted. So far I have had about three sessions, I see my therapist everyday. We do this thing where everything goes quiet and it is just us two. The first session was pretty much just silence. I am new to this therapy thing. There was too much feeling on the inside of me and not enough words.

The next session is when I was able to say something. I wonder if my therapist could make out what I was saying because I was just weeping uncontrollably. At first I was saying I didn't know why I was crying, why I felt the way I was feeling, I hate feeling and so on and so forth and He said nothing for some good time. So I was feeling inadequate, under-achiever like, attacked from all sides and scared. I was living life on the defensive,I was practically walking around with fists clenched ready to fight to protect me! Oh, how stressful!!!

I am not used to taking care of me. I am totally spoilt by my Father. He tells me to give no thought to those things because He knows that I have need of them but rather to just delight myself in Him. Without realising it, I had tried to try and take care of myself again. I was living out of balance; out of joint. So He told me that He is more interested in me than in anything I could ever do for Him. He told me that even when I am to do for Him anything, He will enable me and He will make sure I do it well. He also reminded me of my awesome big brother; the first born who is perfection himself by the way. We all look up to Him and it is He who made it possible for us to be this close to dad anyway.

Anyway, He pointed out that in as much as he was a person who helped people a lot and staff, He always had some alone time to just hang with Dad. I was told to stop trying so hard. I was thinking too much and also feeling too much. I usually have more than one session a day because they are FREE!!!! and I don't have to make appointments,anytime is okay. Being in therapy with your father is awesome; what's even more awesome is if your father is the Lord God Almighty. With a big brother like Jesus,of course I am on my way to being fine, to being more than okay. to being WHOLE :)